Please Don’t Destroy Lyrics – Saturday Night Live
Singer: Saturday Night Live
Title: Please Don’t Destroy
Just feels like the whole thing is, we’re all donkeys
Come on in!
What’s up, boys!
Pete and how
Pete man!
The king of Staten Island himself!
What?
Nothing, what’s up?
I just wanna say you guys have been making some really fun videos for the show this year
Dude!
Thank you, man! That’s really nice
Got me thinking, like, we should all do a video together. I had this idea about how we could, like, do a music video about how we’re all like best friends and how we’re all, like, boys
Wе would be in it with you?
Yeah, you guys would be thе boys
Yeah! Oh my God!
Let’s do it!
Yo, it’s Pete with PDD. Let’s go
Another day in the life of Pete
Just sittin’ in the courtside seat
People wanna take my picture with selfie sticks
It winds up on Page Six
It’s never-ending
Every day I’m trending
People wanna see the texts that I’m sending
All my friends are cool and famous
Except these three sad virgins
Three sad virgins what
Three sad virgins whoa
Three sad virgins what
Three sad virgins whoa
Can we take a timeout?
What’s goin’ on, guys? You having fun?
I’m having a blast! Quick question: Is this about us?
Which part?
I guess the “three sad virgins” part?
Yeah!
We have had sex. Maybe not super-recently
Guys, it’s just a parody video. You guys are playing characters
Characters!
So people won’t think it’s us
It’s not about you at all
Their names are Martin, Ben, and John
And they work at the show I’m on
They just don’t have any swag
They’re tall and weird and sad
John’s loud but not very smart
Ben’s breath kinda smells like a fart
And Martin’s p#n#s tip is way too red
At least that’s what his doctor said
Three sad virgins what
He’s talking about us!
Three sad virgins whoa
Oh my God!
That was my real doctor!
We gotta say something
Yeah!
Pete?
What?
We love it!
Love it!
I just had, like, one tiny thought
This guy has notes? Leave it as is! It’s rockin’, dude
Do you have an ashtray, by any chance? Oh yeah, thanks bro
My only thing is, maybe it could just be, like, completely different?
Oh, yeah!
Maybe something topical, like Dune’s a big movie? Maybe something with Dune?
A Dune rap!
All right, guys. It’s now a Dune rap! So let’s get some f—– sand in here!
Yeah!
The planet Dune is very nice
It’s a world that’s made of spice
It’s sandy like a playa
With Zendaya
I’m gonna ride a worm
And these guys suck
Three sad virgins what
Three sad virgins on Dune
Why is he humiliating us? Ben, why are you dressed as Wendy from Wendy’s?
Pete made me do it
And why are we up here?
He said we’re like the flying sad sacks
You know what? We can’t stand for this!
Yeah!
No, no! Ben!
You okay, dude?
You guys ready to go in again?
No!
We can’t do this anymore! It’s humiliating!
Damn guys, I’m sorry. I thought this would be a fun thing for all of us. If it’s not, then let’s just end it
Thanks, Pete
Thank you, Pete
I mean, after we do the bridge
Wait, what bridge?
Hey, Pete
Hey, Taylor
Ben is like a sad Ron Weasley
He looks like if Big BIrd lost all his feathers
And Martin has the charm and the sex appeal
Of a scarecrow
That’s not true!
John has a big-ass bowling ball head
How does he stay upright with that big fat melon?
And none of them have the guts to take their shirts off
In front of a girl
Yeah, that’s accurate
‘Cause they’re three sad virgins what
Three sad virgins whoa
Three sad virgins what
Three sad virgins whoa
Three sad virgins what
Three sad virgins whoa
Three sad virgins what
And they’re gonna die alone
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Lyrics Saturday Night Live – Please Don’t Destroy
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